Lohan Bombed on SNL and Here’s Why

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Let me start by saying that as much as I am not one bit surprised that Lohan’s appearance on Saturday Night Live was mediocre at best,  there was a big part me that hoped things would go otherwise. Not because I am as deluded as Lindsay seemed to be over the last week in regards to the impact of a single appearance on SNL can have on her overall career but because in all honesty, I just figured she could do it.

Her opening monologue, though not really funny, did a good job of poking fun at Lindsay and all the issues that come along with her. Still, we had press releases and interviews all week with promises about how Lindsay claimed “nothing was off limits” and she really wanted to show people she was “in on the joke” , and if that was no rules writing for the people running things over at SNL, then it was pretty disappointing.

The later skits mostly featured her as a prop versus a real host. She, she showed up and delivered her lines, but there was barely any real “acting”, not how I understand the definition anyways.  The whole thing reminded me of when they have sports players come host the shows. They aren’t actors and their lines sound forced and are delivered poorly for the most part but in the end that’s what makes it funny.

Linday Lohan is an actress though, or so she keeps trying to convince us and to have someone who is always going on and on about what a great actress she is and spent a week on an interview blitz talking about how committed she is to having this chance back at SNL only to be able to barley get through reading the cue cards for the minimal amount of lines she has is a fucking joke.

The deal, for me anyways, was sealed early in the show when during  Keenan Thompson’s recurring scared straight sketch , she botched the one 4 or 5 sentences she has to say, – the longest stretch of lines she had the entire show.

After that, her role was left to being a fixture on the side or background of the skits – not even the fraction of the amount of work someone like Alec Baldwin, for example, does when hosting the show.

And then there was Jon Hamm. What the FUCK was John Hamm doing there? Did they really anticipate that things would tank so bad that they wanted to have an extra rip cord to pull just in case? What does that say about what the people are SNL really thought of her being there?  In the opening monologue his role was funny – they claimed her was there as a back up in case she did something crazynd needed to be replaced – and everyone, including me, had a laugh.

But in the end, the focus sort of got diverted from her to him, which case that joke is only funny because it’s actually fucking true. she was fucking up and he saved things.

Lindsay can talk all she wants about how Lorne Micheals has been like an uncle to her and countless press releases can be sent out about how happy they were to have her back and how professional she was but the bottom line was they had her there because they knew idiots like me would stay home and watch and that’s exactly what I did. I may be stupid,

Comeback, it was not. She had one job to do and it wasn’t a big one and as usual she gave it the Lindsay Lohan 75%. What a fucking joke.