Kris Jenner is Still an Evil Betch

For those of us who were formally in love with Robert Kardashian, circa KUWK season 1 and 2, it’s difficult to accept the circumstances that we have to work with as of now. Rob has increasingly become increasingly heavier upon breaking up with Def Records signed-singer, Rita Ora, as of last year. It’s apparent that Rob is just in a rough spot and will snap back because that’s what hot dudes with nice asses are capable of. And let me remind you of dat ass:

rob-kardashian-buttYUP!!! Yes please. It’s apparent that the gargantuan booty gene is hereditary in the Kardashian family, and we are so blessed that Rob was graced with it because he works it so much harder than his older sister, Kim.

Anyway, Kris Jenner has evidentially been sipping too heavily on the Haterade as of recently, because she has made it clear that she is not a fan of Rob’s weight gain, in fact, she called him an embarrassment to the Kardashian name. Via, Daily Mail:

“A source told the publication: ‘Rob is fatter than ever, and Kris finally flat out told him he’s an embarrassment to the family.’

‘She called him a fat slob and said he’s losing out on business opportunities because no one wants someone as huge.'”

Uhhhhm, excuse me, betch, at least he isn’t moseying around looking like Liza Minnelli’s tanner younger sister. If Rob Kardashian is an embarrassment to the Kardashian name, then please explain the following:

  1. Kim Kardashian’s sex tape
  2. Kim Kardashian’s televised fake wedding
  3. Kim Kardashian’s fake marriage only lasting 70 days
  4. Kimye
  5. The Kardashian Kollection (available at Sears)
  6. The entire Keeping Up With the Kardashians franchise
  7. Bruce Jenner’s supposed pre-sex change
  8. Kris Jenner’s failed talk show
  9. Scott Disick
  10. Khloe Kardashian’s unpredictable camel toe

Am I missing anything? You get the point. Rob’s weight should be the least of the Kardashian’s concerns as of now in terms of their public image, because I can assure them that it was tarnished as soon as they came to the scene. Of course we’ll always miss the days where Rob Kardashian looked fine as hayell with that tight ass of his, but we’ll be there to defend him until he gets his shit straight again. Love you, Rob. Screen Shot 2014-02-05 at 5.10.28 PM



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