Top Ten Kim’s Booty Is In Remission

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Kim Kardashian spontaneously went on a Twitter rant about how fat her ass is today, as if that needed any more publication. Then she romped around town wearing a Yeezy ass-veil because of this newly founded self-consciousness. Okay, Kim. How about you just give that big ass of yours a rest and SIT down. Here’s Top Ten Kim’s Booty Is In Remission.


10. Kim unveiled her first custom-made ass-veil on Jimmy Kimmel last night and we really wish she had just worn a kimono.

9. Ulyana Sergeenko should make one of these for Nikki Minaj’s ass.

8. Today Kim debuted another ass-veil, but this time it was also utilized as an advertisement for Kim’s Lord and Savior Yeezus Christ.
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7. But in short, it was an ass-veil to the miz-ax.
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6. That’s right, folks. Nothing draws attention away from ones ass than having the words “YEEZUS TOUR” embroidered on your ass-veil.
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5. It must be so hard to have such a big-old ghetto booty, a successful porno, and a rich husband. Take it away, Kim.
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4. Tell us all about your real life struggles.
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3. Meanwhile we’ll just continue wondering why it is that you are all of the sudden expressing such concern over the size of your gargantuan ass in dressing the way you have been.
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2. But you’re right- your child-bearing hips have been looking more ripe than ever before.

But you kind of deserve it. (Sorry we’re not sorry).
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1. But let’s be real. Ass-veils make 0.00 sense when you’re posting pictures like this on Instagram on a regular basis.